I honestly don’t know where to take this blog. I’ve been blogging for almost six years now, publishing a new post every month without fail, and this has become one of the most important and fulfilling personal projects of my life. But my enthusiasm for my weekly writing sessions has started to wane. I know I definitely want to keep doing this, but at the same time I also know I need to find a clearer direction and purpose to keep me excited about it.
Up until now my whole goal has been to write about what interests me, whatever that is. At the beginning of each month I scroll through a list of potential topics in my mind and then make a selection, which generally comes pretty easily. There are plenty of stories and concepts that I’ve been carrying around with me and have been fixated on writing about for years, sometimes decades, and I’ve been working through them one by one.
I’m in a different place today. Most of the subjects I’ve wanted to write about for so long have now been documented here, and the topics I should explore going forward are no longer obvious to me. So what should I write about now?
I’m also in a different place emotionally. Writing everything I’ve written here, delving into my feelings, documenting my past, has allowed me to develop a much stronger sense of self, to accept myself more, to love myself more, to feel more justified in the decisions I’ve made in life. In other words, blogging has helped me find some peace. Whereas an early blog post might have served as a release valve, giving me the opportunity to let out pressure and perhaps even pain that had built up around a specific subject or happening, now there’s a lot less tension within me. Through blogging I’ve been systematically releasing it on a monthly basis. This has left me feeling more relaxed and with a lot less drive to investigate my depths. That’s a good thing for sure, but again, what should I write about now?
I love writing, I know that. I love writing a story that excites me or makes me cry, and I love sharing stories that make others feel the same. For years now I’ve been kind of obsessed with telling my story, examining my life, sharing my feelings, chronicling the challenges I’ve faced. But now it feels like it’s time to start moving in a new direction.
So what should I do? In what direction should I head?
I want to reinvent this blog, to turn it into something I’m really excited about again. I also want to transform it into something I’m eager to share with other people. And I think the key to both of these things will be changing the blog’s focus from my most recent monthly post to featuring (and hopefully actively sharing) my best stuff. What’s it going to take to do that?
For starters, I think I need to change how this blog presents itself. That means leading with the library I’ve created over time, not the most recent post. There’s too much pressure around the most recent post. Certain posts work much better than others, and since I only want to feature and share the posts I’m super proud of, on some months it feels more than a little strange to have the most recent post that I have mixed feelings about headlining my website. Considering I’ve published more than 70 posts at this point, I assume I’ve got 20 or 30 that I think are really good, or at least could be really good with a little refinement. I want this blog to showcase and feature those posts, because they’re the best things I’ve written, and I feel good and strongly about them.
So the first thing I’m probably going to to do is rearrange my blog to craft an experience for all visitors that allows them to easily find and read my best writing. I’ve got ideas on how to do this that I want to work on, but more on this later.
And then once I’ve rearranged my website to focus on my best stuff, where do I go from there? How do I then start “actively sharing” my best writing?
One way is to try to get things published, which I intend to do. I can also better share and spread what I’ve self-published on my own platform with an email newsletter or social media support or something else. I’d like to do that too, but I’m less excited about it. I also think the path to sharing more will make itself clearer once my blog has been reorganized.
So here’s the deal: I’m going to take the next three months off from publishing monthly posts. That means I won’t post again until December. I will have just turned forty eight at the end of November, and by then my goal is to not only have this website reconfigured, but to also submit three of my stories for publication.
What stories will I submit and where will I submit them? I don’t know yet. That’s one of the main things I’ll figure out over the next 3 months.
How will I reconfigure this website? I also don’t know the answer to that, but my feeling right now is that I’ll craft a new homepage that features the “categories” I often write about, like my personal history, or my personal philosophy, or musings on business. I’ll then list my best posts on these topics under a header for each category, and leave off everything that doesn't meet the standard I’m going for. I’ll still have a blog page, but that will be more “off to the side” and will require an extra click or two to access.
I also want to “prune” my blog, meaning I’m going to take down the posts that I consider to be my weakest. I also might take down one or more posts that I consider too personal, that I don’t really want out there for all eternity. That will leave only the writing that I’m proud of and excited about, and my hope is that I’ll start to view the blog in a new way at that point. Not only will the overall quality be higher, but it also won’t be directionless. I’ll have topics that are meaningful to me, that I’ve explored in the past and will likely continue to explore in the future. The blog will no longer be about whatever interests me, it will be about specific topics that interest me greatly, and ideally I’ll build up a body of work around each of them.
For the next three months I’ll still sit down twice a week to work on my blog, I just won’t be writing new stuff, I’ll be working on the blog itself, just as I’ll be figuring out where and how I can send my pieces to be considered for publication.
Come December I hope to have figured out a new direction, and I hope I’ll have new energy to start pushing down this path. I also hope I’ll come to realize how much I’ve learned over the past 6 years of writing, how much I’ve grown. The fact is I’ve grown a lot, both as a writer and as a human being..
I have always felt and still feel that I have something to say, something creative and meaningful to contribute to this world. But what is that? And how can I contribute to the world if I’m afraid to share my creations? That’s another thing I’m looking to figure out in the next few months.
In my forties I learned how to express my deepest feelings. In my fifties I’d love to share them with the world in a way that will help others, that will make them feel more loved and secure on this crazy journey we’re all on.
If you’re reading this then I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your interest and support. See you in December!